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Usain Bolt Sets 150-Meter World Record

Michael David Smith — Tue, 19 May 2009 11:40:00 EST

Filed under: International Olympics, International Track and Field

Usain Bolt is the fastest man in the world at 100 meters and the fastest man in the world at 200 meters, so it's not like anyone doubted that he's also the fastest man in the world at 150 meters. But just to prove the obvious, Bolt ran in a 150-meter race over the weekend, and he ran the fastest time ever recorded.

Bolt finished the 150-meter sprint in 14.35 seconds, easily topping the time of 14.99 seconds set by Donovan Bailey in his famous 1997 race with Michael Johnson. Bolt easily out-ran Marlon Devonish, Ivory Williams and Rikki Fifton.

The 150-meter dash is hardly ever run, and Bolt's time is really an unofficial world record. But it's still noteworthy if for no other reason than it's the first time Bolt has competed since suffering a foot injury in a car crash.

"I'm not in the best shape and I still have a lot of work to do," Bolt said afterward, "But I am getting there."

Usain Bolt Sets 150-Meter World Record originally appeared on Back Porch FanHouse on Tue, 19 May 2009 11:40:00 EST . Please see our terms for use of feeds.

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The Shambolic World of Nigerian Athletics

Orson Swindle — Wed, 25 Jul 2007 09:14:00 EST

Filed under: International Olympics, International Track and Field

According to the Lagos Vanguard, the Nigerian athletes participating at the All-Africa games arrived in the host city of Algiers, Algeria without proper equipment or uniforms for the games, prompting one sprinter to shun his country's flag entirely during the medal ceremony.

From the Vanguard, via All Africa.com:

Nigerian athletes did not have kits. They appeared in their different colours, not uniformed. Even during medal presentations, the Nigerian winners would only be known when the announcers identify them. They had no Nigerian Track Suits for such colourful events. Big Shame.

An athlete without a track suit simply cannot win! Or at least, they cannot look cool pulling off the ripoff pants prior to competition. (Note to self: We need to start using that phrase more: Big Shame.) The Nigerian National Sports Commission has been the target of--shocking!---allegations of theft and fraud for years in the nation, as Nigeria is the most populous and one of the wealthiest nations in Africa yet struggles to field consistently competitive teams or contingents in any major international sport.

Nigeria's not alone, however, in their administrative bungling. The All-Africa games as a whole may fall under new management in the form of the African Olympic Committee, who would be taking over from the ham-handed mismanagement of the African Union's sporting division. (And we all know how transparent and honest Olympic committees are. ) Nevertheless, it may be trading horrible management for merely bad, which would be a marked improvement.

The Shambolic World of Nigerian Athletics originally appeared on Back Porch FanHouse on Wed, 25 Jul 2007 09:14:00 EST . Please see our terms for use of feeds.

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The Debriefing: Olympic Sprinters Should Cut Off Their Legs

mjd — Wed, 11 Jul 2007 09:00:00 EST

Filed under: Track and Field, International Track and Field, The Word

The Debriefing is a column that runs every weekday at 9:00 a.m. here on FanHouse. It goes deep into one issue and then bounces around to a plethora of smaller ones ... and does it all in a way that will make you feel like the prettiest girl at the cotillion. Bookmark this page, and visit daily.

I don't normally pay a lot of attention to the Norwich Union Grand Prix. I haven't followed the event closely since Lars Axegolf was disqualified in 1978 for stuffing two shot-puts down the front of his shorts and telling people he had elephantitis and deserved a head-start in the 400 meter sprint. I could never get over the scandal.

But the issue of disability in sports has again come to the forefront in the Norwich Union Grand Prix. A South-African sprinter, a man by the name of Oscar Pistorius, has gotten permission to run the 400m. Track and field really isn't my thing, so normally, I wouldn't have taken notice ... but Oscar Pistorius doesn't really have legs. That makes his presence in a sprint somewhat unique, yes?

(Also at the bottom: We're going to be seeing a lot of Dane Cook, Eric Brynes' bulldog couldn't get away in time, and South Koreans really suck at football.)

Oscar, you see, was born without fibulas. Fibulas are the less famous of the two bones connecting the knee to the ankle, the bigger and more appreciated one being the tibia. The fibula is the smaller, thinner bone that runs along the outside, and you probably don't really appreciate your fibula, but you'd miss it if it was gone. If you had to live just five minutes without yours, you would immediately campaign for its inclusion into the "knee bone is connected to the thigh bone" song, no matter how badly a three-syllable word threw that lovable children's song into rhythmic chaos.

Do to his lack of fibulas, Oscar had his legs amputated at the knee when he was 11 months old. He runs with prosthetics called Cheetahs, which look like giant carbon-fiber shoehorns.

And after proving that he was good enough to compete, last month, the International Association of Athletics Federations (IAAF) gave Oscar permission to run in events alongside non-disabled competitors (he's still trying to get into the Olympics, however). He ran the 400m in 46.56 seconds, impressive compared to the 44.00 time that won the Olympic gold in 2004. In the 200m, Oscar ran a 21.58, and in 19.79 took the gold. And in the 100m, Oscar ran a 10.91, while 9.85 earned a gold medal.

So he's not the world's fastest, by any means ... he's not close. He's in the ballpark, right? He should be able to compete?

Not so fast, according to some competitors. They argue that Oscar has an unfair advantage because of his prosthetics, because they allow him to have a longer stride than someone with their naturally-born legs.

Putting aside for a second the sheer ridiculous notion that someone who was born without fibulas has an advantage in a sprint, I'd like to show you this excerpt from a letter by Trevor Brauckmann, the prosthetisit for Oscar Pistorius.

A lot is made of the "spring loaded blades" and how they assist him with running faster. The facts are that they are not spring loaded and that he has to physically force the feet to load and return energy. The nature of the material is such that what you put in is some of what you get back (between 10% and 60%). Factors such as gravity and compression of body tissue allows for loss in energy return.

The feet can be likened to stilts that are springy or lively. The feet have no electronic or mechanical devices or for that manner any other form of powering themselves. Therefore if you walk flat footed you will not get any energy return and will therefore not move at any great pace. By the way, the feet have no heals and in a patient with two amputations this makes standing and walking in a "normal" fashion almost impossible.

So I ask you. If you were in a sprint next month, and you could choose what you have below your knee, and you had the following two choices ...

Option A: Your foot.

Option B: This thing:

Which one are you going with? I'll take the foot, thanks. That thing looks more like a hockey stick from the year 2085, and my pedicurist wouldn't have any idea what to do with it.

Let me take a second here and make sure I understand this argument correctly. There are a group of athletes who are equipped with natural limbs ... natural limbs which have evolved over 85 million years to serve human beings the best they possibly can, and these athletes have had their entire lives to learn how to use these limbs to their maximum capabilities.

And then there's one guy who has a carbon fiber thingamajig attached to his knee that comes with a 12-month warranty. And I'm to believe that he has the advantage? Must be one hell of a warranty on that thing.

You know, if Oscar were interested in cheating someone, I think he'd just get into blood doping or EPO, just like everyone else. If we're going to take into account Oscar Pistorius' "advantages," shouldn't we also take into account some disadvantages? Things like, oh, I don't know... having stumps for legs? Isn't this a pretty large barrier for an aspiring Olympic sprinter?

When this guy trains, he has to consider countless other things that non-disabled athletes would never consider. What remains of his legs probably hurts like hell and bleeds and oozes and all sorts of nasty things. He's got to worry about these things coming off, breaking, cracking ... what if he's past his 12 month warranty?

I'm just not buying rhat Oscar Pistorius has it easier because he uses prosthetics. You know, there's a reason that Sarah Connor was able to take down the Terminator. There's a reason that RoboCop wasn't able to forge out a long-lasting career in World Championship Wrestling. There's a reason that Buster Bluth was so upset after a seal in a yellow bowtie bit off his hand, forcing him to replace it with a metal hook. If Hollywood's taught us anything, it's that the natural human limb is always, always the preferable option.

If the Cheetahs made their users cheaters, then the sprint times from the Cheetah users would all be faster than the Olympic times from non-disabled athletes. Not the case. In fact, no one else is even as close to as fast as Pistorius on the Cheetahs, suggesting that his speed is due not to his technology, but to his speed.

Tell you what, fellow competitors ... if you really believe that Pistorius has an unfair advantage, or you just want to see how much faster his fake legs make him go, I'm willing to help you out. I've got a big rusty saw, and I've got a wooden spoon you can hold between your teeth while I hack your limbs off, Dances With Wolves-style.

You should be good to go for the '08 Olympics in Sydney. World records are going to fall, I can feel it.

... because I bet you didn't think you'd see a picture of Paul Pierce shaking hands with Jose Mourinho, while Juan Dixon stands in the background looking angry today. Tomorrow, Stephen Jackson enjoying a daiquiri with Joey Barton.

At Least Albert Pujols Got Some Rest ...

You're down by a run in the bottom of the 9th in the All-Star game, there are two down, the sacks are drunk, and the pitcher on the mound is struggling. You also happen to have arguably your best hitter, sitting on the bench, ready to go.

Or, you can can let Orlando Hudson and Aaron Rowand take the last two at-bats.

Tony LaRussa said after the game that he was saving Albert Pujols in case the game went in to extra innings, which is a terrific philosophy. A lot of boxers do the same thing, and they come out and just stand there and get punched in the face for 11 rounds, saving their energy in case they need to swing at someone in the 12th.

Albert was unhappy after the game.

"It's the All-Star game. He can do what he wants," Pujols said Tuesday night. "He does whatever he wants. If I wasn't expecting to play, I wouldn't have come up here."

And LaRussa responded.

"If he wants to get upset, he can get upset," La Russa said. "Whatever he wants to do, he can do. It's America. That wasn't the most important thing tonight."

I'm glad you both recognize each other's freedoms as American citizens, but now that that's out of the way, I'd like to know, Tony, what was the most important thing last night?

Paula Cole during the 7th inning stretch? Chevy getting to show off their Tahoe Hybrid? Because it seems like if winning was the most important thing, you'd have wanted Albert Pujols to get at least one freaking at-bat last night, possibly in the most clutch situation for your team. Just a thought.

And now the Padres have to win the World Series without homefield advantage. Thanks a lot.

I Think Enough Time Has Passed ...

Police have identified a handful of suspects in the gunpoint robbing of Antoine Walker. All suspects were said to be between the heights of 6'3" and 7'1", were wearing silky red tank tops and knee-length shorts with numbers and their last names emblazoned across the back.

In another odd coincidence, all suspects offered the same motive for holding a gun to Antoine's head, saying, "It's the only way we can get him to pass us the damn ball."

Barry Bonds And Hank Aaron Are Being Catty ...

Barry Bonds eagerly grants that Alex Rodriguez will one day break his soon-to-be all-time homerun record, and when asked if Bonds would be there on the day to congratulate A-Rod, he said this:

"Like I told Alex, man, you'll break it. And when you do, you don't have to worry about calling me. I'll call you. If you want me there, I'll be there. I'll be there in a heartbeat."

The not-so-subtle implication there is, "Screw you, Henry Aaron." Hank, if you missed it, has expressed a desire to be anywhere on the planet other than where Barry Bonds will break his all-time HR record.

Both guys are completely talking around the issue. Aaron won't come out and say why he won't be there, but he clearly feels like Bonds has cheated to break a record that should remain his. And Bonds clearly feels like Aaron is being an ass and is hurt by his unwillingness to attend.

Just come out and say it, guys ... call each other douchebags. You'll feel better, and we'll all have more fun.

We're Still Pretty Good At Football ...

Remember the World Cup of American Football I mentioned last week? It's underway, and we're doing okay so far.

We had a tough matchup against South Korea in the first round, and were fortunate to eke one out by a score of 77-0. The South Koreans probably would've done better if they were able to gain more than -31 yards of total offense. Keep in mind that the American team's star running back most recently played at football powerhouse Fairmont State.

Here's a link to the official IFAF World Championships site, which appears to be in Japanese. Fortunately for you all, I'm fluent in Japanese and can translate. The caption underneath the picture of Team USA vs. Korea reads:

"Holy %^@*, man. These guys look like #@(%'ing water buffaloes. How are we supposed to tackle these mother#@(%'ers? We're just #@(%'ed, aren't we?

This isn't going to be like competitive eating, where we sent Kobayashi over, and he embarrassed you, until one of you idiots figured it out and beat our guy because he was hurt.

No, you guys are actually pretty good at this. Not to mention, #@(%'ING HUGE. We're going to get the %^@* kicked out of us."

Our next opponent (courtesy of 100% Injury Rate) is Germany, who also annihilated the South Koreans, but by not as quite a decisive a score. They beat them 32-2. The Japanese, meanwhile, the tournament "favorite," beat France 48-0. We take on the Germans, which has historically worked out for us pretty well, on Thursday ... right before the Japanese play the Swedes.

We've gotta get this into the Olympics as soon as possible, before these other countries discover HGH.

Eric Byrnes' "Swimming" Bulldog. Because he/she was the least irritating media presence in McCovey Cove over the past two days (that's not the dog in question pictured, by the way). "Hey, look at me, I'm a reporter, and I'm in the water! On a boat! Look at that! That squirrel can water-ski."

As cute as the dog was, though, I'm not sure it actually qualifies as a "swimming" bulldog. Listen, you can take any dog, put a lifejacket on it, and toss it in the water, but that doesn't make it a swimming bulldog. It makes it a bulldog that you just tossed in the water. You can do the same thing with a newborn baby if you want (I've found that parents tend to frown on this, however), but it doesn't mean the little guy left the womb with the ability to swim.

Byrnes tossed a baseball into the water, and then implored his dog to after it ... eventually, the dog did make the plunge, but paddled in the opposition direction, towards freedom. Good for you, doggie. Don't be anyone's canine media whore.

Dane Cook. I had a long internal struggle before putting this here. Not because I can't figure out if I like Dane Cook or not ... I figured that one out for myself for a while ago. I don't get him, he rarely makes me laugh ... it's just not for me. But hey, different strokes, right?

It just seems like I hate every choice every professional sports league makes to do their promo spots, sing their national anthems, do their halftime shows, etc. Every single one. So at a certain point, I've got to ask myself, "Is it the NBA, NFL, and MLB that always screw this up, or am I just a curmudgeonly cynic who hates everything?"

I spent about an hour on this, and here's what I came up with: I loved the NFL's "Playoffs" spots with Don Cheadle, and the Prince selection for the last Super Bowl halftime show was fantastic. And after suffering through Cowboy Troy at the NBA All-Star Game, I believe I have earned the eternal right to hate, without any thought or consideration, any entertainment decision that any sports league ever makes, from now until the end of the world.

So this one stands.

7:30, ESPNU. FIFA U-20 World Cup, USA vs. Uruguay.
7:30, ESPN2. Minor-League Baseball: AAA All-Star Game.
10:00 (or so). ESPN. The Bronx is Burning.
11:00, ESPN2. Boxing. Wednesday Night Fights.
11:00, ESPNU. FIFA U-20 World Cup, Spain vs. Brazil.

The Debriefing: Olympic Sprinters Should Cut Off Their Legs originally appeared on Back Porch FanHouse on Wed, 11 Jul 2007 09:00:00 EST . Please see our terms for use of feeds.

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Oscar Pistorius To Race That Fast White Guy from the Olympics

Orson Swindle — Thu, 28 Jun 2007 11:07:00 EST

Filed under: International Track and Field

South African Oscar Pistorius is the best runner in the world...who happens to not have legs.

Pistorius was born without legs below the knee, and runs with the assistance of bladed prostheses called "Cheetahs." He's engaged in a campaign to compete in the Olympics, which the International Amateur Athletic Federation has already banned him from once citing the potential for an unfair advantage from his artificial limbs. (The IAAF has reversed that decision, pending tests to see if Pistorius has any advantage at all due to the "Cheetahs.")

The latest episode in his fascinating story: Pistorius will compete in the Norwich Sheffield Grand Prix on July 15th. It is the first race for Pistorius after the IAAF green-lighted his racing against the regular field of sprinters, and he is particularly excited about facing off against Jeremy Wariner, who is best remembered as the "Holy Crap What Is A White Guy Doing Winning A Sprint Event" guy from the Sydney games.

"With the likes of Jeremy Wariner in the field I couldn't ask for a stronger test, but these are the sort of challenges I want," said Pistorius, 20.

Pistorius isn't tilting at windmills here--having set the world records for paralympic athletes in the 100, 200, and 400m distances, he competed last month in the South African national championships and placed second in a field of fully-able athletes. There's nowhere else left for him to compete.

Oscar Pistorius To Race That Fast White Guy from the Olympics originally appeared on Back Porch FanHouse on Thu, 28 Jun 2007 11:07:00 EST . Please see our terms for use of feeds.

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